Littlest Sausage

Last night, went to swim
at my gym. The pool was chock-full
of numpties. Not good.

No, I'm not going to post entirely in haiku. That requires multo effort. More than I am willing to give this afternoon.

I finally dragged myself to the gym last night. I managed to stay there for an entire hour before being so bored I thought I was going to chew my arm off. The pool looked pretty empty, so I showered, changed and dove in, thinking I could aim for about 30 lengths before going home. I was getting my swim on, and 8 lengths in this eedjit* entered. He proceeded to swim backstroke diagonally from one corner of the pool to the other, floundering as he tried not to drown. This dude had pretty much the entire pool to swim in, and boy was he going to use the entire pool. And get in my way. A couple of times I had to swim underneath him so I didn't have to stop. In the end I made it quite clear that I was using just the one lane, so could he please not get in my way?


*I mean, seriously - fish, the same creatures who look at a nylon string with a very sharp hook attached and think "Hmmm! Tasty!" still manage to swim straight.


Needless to say, I did not complete my 30 lengths. I don't think I will swim there again on a Wednesday night.

Swim attempt thwarted.
Stomped home, savage wind biting my
evermore reddening nose.


No! Quick, pat pocket.
Allegiant harmonica safe.
Phew, not lost. Relief.